Terry Burton is a retired veteran of Alberta’s oil and heavy construction industry and a former member of the Alberta Apprenticeship Board.Note: I have never written anything with such a feeling of immense disappointment, such a great sense of loss, and with such a feeling of trepidation, resignation, and despair. I’m struck with the wisdom of the following as I seek shelter and refuge from this ongoing breakdown in our Canadian and American family relationship.“Therefore, do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble,” Matthew 6:34, and (slightly amended), "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life [as we both have done numerous times] for one’s [dearest friend, that is, respectively, their southern and northern neighbour],” John 15:13.Let me begin by making one thing absolutely clear. This letter is not written out of hatred or disrespect. It is written out of affection, disappointment, and genuine concern.For most of my life, I have admired the United States. Like millions of Canadians, I have defended America in conversations at home and abroad because I believed our countries shared something unique — a relationship built not merely on geography, but on mutual trust, shared sacrifice, common values, and genuine friendship.That is why what is now happening between our countries is so deeply painful.Family relationships, like those between neighbours, occasionally experience disagreements. No relationship is perfect. But when disagreements give way to insults, intimidation, and public humiliation, something much deeper is damaged. Trust begins to erode.That is where many Canadians find themselves today..Canadians are not an angry people by nature. We are generally patient, measured, and reluctant to interfere in the affairs of others. Yet it has become increasingly difficult to remain silent as political leaders and media personalities in the United States repeatedly demean Canada, question our sovereignty, and speak of us as though we are somehow dependent upon American goodwill.We are not.Canadians are proud of our country — not because we believe it is perfect, but because it is ours and, like yours, that is, “Canada is one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.”We are a nation of more than 41 million people with two official languages, the world's second-largest landmass, three ocean coastlines, vibrant pluralistic communities, respected democratic institutions, innovative businesses, internationally recognized universities, and a society built upon the rule of law, compromise, and mutual respect.Like every country, we have our challenges. Canada is not unfinished. We have work to do, nor is it waiting to become America's fifty-first state nor its fifty-first to sixty-third (we do have ten provinces and three territories) states.With respect, that idea is neither amusing nor flattering.We already have our own immediate family..And while we celebrate America's extraordinary accomplishments, we ask only that ours receive the same respect.Our history together has been remarkable.Canadians have stood beside Americans through two World Wars, Korea, Afghanistan, the Gulf War, and countless international missions. Canadian blood has been spilled alongside American blood in defence of freedom.When America suffered on September 11, Canadians opened their homes and communities to thousands of stranded Americans in Gander and across Atlantic Canada without hesitation. During the Iranian hostage crisis, Canadians quietly helped rescue American diplomats. Through NATO and NORAD, we have defended North America together for generations.Economically, our partnership has become one of the most successful in modern history. Canada has long been America's largest export market, one of its most reliable suppliers of energy and critical minerals, a trusted investment partner, and a major contributor to the prosperity enjoyed on both sides of the border. Together, we have demonstrated what two sovereign nations can accomplish through cooperation rather than coercion.That relationship should never be taken for granted.Which is why many Canadians struggle to understand the increasingly hostile rhetoric directed toward our country..When tariffs are imposed on your closest trading partner, when our sovereignty is casually questioned, when public demands are made that Canadians should somehow surrender their independence, it is difficult not to feel insulted.Respect cannot be demanded.It must be earned and reciprocated.Canadians have never expected special treatment. We have simply expected the same courtesy we have tried to extend to our American neighbours for generations.Many Americans speak proudly of free markets and capitalism, yet tariffs imposed on your closest ally ultimately burden businesses and consumers on both sides of the border. Trade disputes may sometimes be necessary, but they should be approached as disagreements between partners — not punishments imposed upon friends.Perhaps what hurts Canadians most is not the policy disagreements.It is the tone.Friendship cannot survive where one friend continually speaks down to the other..Neighbourliness cannot flourish where one neighbour appears to believe that size alone confers wisdom or moral authority.Canadians have responded in ways many of us never imagined we would. We have cancelled trips south. We have chosen Canadian products over American ones. Some have even booed the American national anthem — not because they despise America, but because they desperately wanted Americans to notice that something precious was being damaged.None of this has brought Canadians any satisfaction.It has brought sadness.We never wanted our relationship to reach this point.Many around the world once looked upon Canada and the United States as the gold standard of international friendship: two independent nations sharing the world's longest undefended border while proving that trust, cooperation, and mutual respect could produce prosperity and security for both.Today, that reputation is under strain.I sincerely hope it is not beyond repair..History teaches us that difficult times eventually pass. Governments change. Policies evolve. But relationships between peoples endure — if we choose to preserve them.When America has needed Canada, we have answered.When Canada has needed America, you have answered.That is what families do.So I ask my American cousins to reflect on what has made our relationship so extraordinary. It has never been domination. It has never been coercion. It has never been threats.It has always been respect.Respect for each other's sovereignty.Respect for each other's contributions.Respect for each other's independence..Canada asks for nothing more.We are not your adversary.We are not your possession.We are your oldest friend, your closest neighbour, and your family.Our ancestors crossed oceans to build two remarkable nations side by side. They fought together, traded together, mourned together, celebrated together, and left us a relationship that much of the world admired and envied.Please do not allow temporary political passions to destroy something generations worked so hard to build.Families sometimes disappoint one another.Families sometimes argue.But families also forgive.My hope is that, together, Canadians and Americans will once again choose respect over resentment, partnership over posturing, and friendship over division.Our children — and both our countries — deserve nothing less.Your friend and family member.Terry Burton is a retired veteran of Alberta’s oil and heavy construction industry and a former member of the Alberta Apprenticeship Board.
