Army Lt. Bob Hauk: "You going to kill me, Snake?".Snake Plissken: "Not now, I'm too tired. [pause] Maybe later.".— Escape from New York.It all started when Burt "The Red Deer Cat" and I sat and watched the 1981 film, Escape From New York, starring Kurt Russell, Donald Pleasance, Isaac Hayes and the lovely Adrienne Barbeau.. Burt the Red Deer CatBurt the Red Deer Cat .It was a Friday night, and it was his choice. Burt likes Kurt Russell..Anyone who has seen it knows he's absolutely awesome as the infamous renegade inmate, Snake Plissken..The lone man who can save the US President (Donald Pleasance), whose plane has crashed in lawless Manhattan, New York — now the country's sole maximum-security prison..A John Carpenter special, which calls for buttered popcorn, strawberry licorice and a litre of Coke!.Or cat treats, depending on who you are and how many "paws" you happen to have..Anyway, following this epic film, which did see the president rescued (and revert to his horrible self), and Plissken beat the time bomb implanted in him by evil authorities, I told Burt there were sequels, but this was the best one to see..Burt then posed this, to my surprise..He said he would rather see a badass like Snake Plissken as Canadian prime minister, rather than that prissy drama teacher with the nice hair parading as a world leader..Ooooh, I said, that's kind of mean isn't it, Burt? Wouldn't you rather see a Joe Biden, or, maybe even a George W. Bush?.Not really, he explained..For one thing, Snake Plissken would get things done, no bleeding hearts (Pierre Trudeau's expression) or woke types would stand in his way..Don't like the new federal policies? Too damn bad, Snake would say. It's for the good of the country. You're either with us, or against us..It's 2022, and the time has come to hunt down and eliminate the "woke rot" in government..Nobody, absolutely nobody, will mess with Snake, says the Burt-man..Eco-terrorists destroying pipelines, construction equipment and camps? Hunt them down, arrest them, put them in jail..And if the Mounties don't know how to do that, go to Washington, D.C., and ask the FBI. They seem to be really good at chasing down and arresting treasonous idiots..That doesn't mean putting every green kid with a beret, a rose-hip necklace, playing hacky sack under CSIS surveillance, of course. We can't afford all that..Just do what you are paid to do. Protect Canada's industrial infrastructure, or back of and let someone else do it. And to hell with the political implications..Burt went on ... no claws barred ....The days of eastern domination and exploitation would also be over, Burt claimed..From then on, under Snake's rule, the West would get more seats, more representation, more fairness. It wouldn't be perfect, but it would be better..Something that should have been done years ago..No more being treated like a second or third class citizen. Even if it involved dragging the eastern carpet-baggers, kicking and screaming into it..What about transfer payments, I said? What the hell are we going to do with that..Quebec and Ontario have literally robbed us for decades under the banner of "Confederation," a system that is drastically in need of a revamp..Anyone who even suggests we should take another look at it (Danielle Smith) is dumped on and attacked. Shame on you, Jason Kenney!.What would Snake do with that, I asked Burt?.Well, said Burt, if you're going to take Alberta's money, you're gonna have to tow the line ... the funding will be tied to conditions..That's right, said Burt, conditions. "Les conditions" in Quebecois..You don't want a pipeline through your province? No funding. That's a condition. Don't like it? Too bad so sad..It's not rocket science, nor should it be, Snake would say. You're either a team player, or not a team player — take your pick, Quebec Premier François Legault..Talk big as much as you want in your La Belle kingdom, but just remember, one day your pockets might just be empty. And there will be no one to rescue you..This time, we really would shut off the money pipeline. And be that, as it may..Let's face it, at least you would know where you stood, with Snake. There would be no shenanigans. A straight shooter, all the way..No fake handshakes and drive-by experiences, flipping pancakes and wearing a cowboy hat for an hour, or walking with Ukraine President Zelensky in Kyiv for a cheap photo op..Nor would he tour the NATO boss in Canada's north, showcasing our complete and utter dereliction of duty, forcing the foreign official to lie through his teeth at how great and upstanding a NATO member we really are..Truth be told, Burt and I have never seen such a humiliating, disgusting "Mise-en-scène.".Meanwhile, Justin heaped promises on NORAD spending. Snake, would actually do it, Burt says. He might even double down on those Russkies..For once, make those evil bastards fear us..And another thing, Snake wouldn't appoint a native justice minister, and then try to influence her to bend the law to benefit private interests, Burt said..That would be a no-go. Snake has principles, for crissakes, even if they are principles from a post apocalyptic moviedom era..Something that many highly-paid Canadian politicians don't have, and will never have..So there you go, Snake Plissken in the PMO. A no nonsense leader, who would get 'er done, as we say in Alberta..The best part, is that he'd scare Eastern Canadians. Scare the hell out of them. That, says Burt, would make him sleep good!.But could we trust a man like that, I asked Burt — a cat who grew up on the mean streets of Red Deer, before we rescued him, and gave him a forever home — we're talking about a guy doing time, for doing bad things..Burt licked his right paw, as he often does, and said: "Do you trust the idiot you have in office now?".I had no answer to that. For once, he had me..Watch the movie, it's good. Make your own call.
Army Lt. Bob Hauk: "You going to kill me, Snake?".Snake Plissken: "Not now, I'm too tired. [pause] Maybe later.".— Escape from New York.It all started when Burt "The Red Deer Cat" and I sat and watched the 1981 film, Escape From New York, starring Kurt Russell, Donald Pleasance, Isaac Hayes and the lovely Adrienne Barbeau.. Burt the Red Deer CatBurt the Red Deer Cat .It was a Friday night, and it was his choice. Burt likes Kurt Russell..Anyone who has seen it knows he's absolutely awesome as the infamous renegade inmate, Snake Plissken..The lone man who can save the US President (Donald Pleasance), whose plane has crashed in lawless Manhattan, New York — now the country's sole maximum-security prison..A John Carpenter special, which calls for buttered popcorn, strawberry licorice and a litre of Coke!.Or cat treats, depending on who you are and how many "paws" you happen to have..Anyway, following this epic film, which did see the president rescued (and revert to his horrible self), and Plissken beat the time bomb implanted in him by evil authorities, I told Burt there were sequels, but this was the best one to see..Burt then posed this, to my surprise..He said he would rather see a badass like Snake Plissken as Canadian prime minister, rather than that prissy drama teacher with the nice hair parading as a world leader..Ooooh, I said, that's kind of mean isn't it, Burt? Wouldn't you rather see a Joe Biden, or, maybe even a George W. Bush?.Not really, he explained..For one thing, Snake Plissken would get things done, no bleeding hearts (Pierre Trudeau's expression) or woke types would stand in his way..Don't like the new federal policies? Too damn bad, Snake would say. It's for the good of the country. You're either with us, or against us..It's 2022, and the time has come to hunt down and eliminate the "woke rot" in government..Nobody, absolutely nobody, will mess with Snake, says the Burt-man..Eco-terrorists destroying pipelines, construction equipment and camps? Hunt them down, arrest them, put them in jail..And if the Mounties don't know how to do that, go to Washington, D.C., and ask the FBI. They seem to be really good at chasing down and arresting treasonous idiots..That doesn't mean putting every green kid with a beret, a rose-hip necklace, playing hacky sack under CSIS surveillance, of course. We can't afford all that..Just do what you are paid to do. Protect Canada's industrial infrastructure, or back of and let someone else do it. And to hell with the political implications..Burt went on ... no claws barred ....The days of eastern domination and exploitation would also be over, Burt claimed..From then on, under Snake's rule, the West would get more seats, more representation, more fairness. It wouldn't be perfect, but it would be better..Something that should have been done years ago..No more being treated like a second or third class citizen. Even if it involved dragging the eastern carpet-baggers, kicking and screaming into it..What about transfer payments, I said? What the hell are we going to do with that..Quebec and Ontario have literally robbed us for decades under the banner of "Confederation," a system that is drastically in need of a revamp..Anyone who even suggests we should take another look at it (Danielle Smith) is dumped on and attacked. Shame on you, Jason Kenney!.What would Snake do with that, I asked Burt?.Well, said Burt, if you're going to take Alberta's money, you're gonna have to tow the line ... the funding will be tied to conditions..That's right, said Burt, conditions. "Les conditions" in Quebecois..You don't want a pipeline through your province? No funding. That's a condition. Don't like it? Too bad so sad..It's not rocket science, nor should it be, Snake would say. You're either a team player, or not a team player — take your pick, Quebec Premier François Legault..Talk big as much as you want in your La Belle kingdom, but just remember, one day your pockets might just be empty. And there will be no one to rescue you..This time, we really would shut off the money pipeline. And be that, as it may..Let's face it, at least you would know where you stood, with Snake. There would be no shenanigans. A straight shooter, all the way..No fake handshakes and drive-by experiences, flipping pancakes and wearing a cowboy hat for an hour, or walking with Ukraine President Zelensky in Kyiv for a cheap photo op..Nor would he tour the NATO boss in Canada's north, showcasing our complete and utter dereliction of duty, forcing the foreign official to lie through his teeth at how great and upstanding a NATO member we really are..Truth be told, Burt and I have never seen such a humiliating, disgusting "Mise-en-scène.".Meanwhile, Justin heaped promises on NORAD spending. Snake, would actually do it, Burt says. He might even double down on those Russkies..For once, make those evil bastards fear us..And another thing, Snake wouldn't appoint a native justice minister, and then try to influence her to bend the law to benefit private interests, Burt said..That would be a no-go. Snake has principles, for crissakes, even if they are principles from a post apocalyptic moviedom era..Something that many highly-paid Canadian politicians don't have, and will never have..So there you go, Snake Plissken in the PMO. A no nonsense leader, who would get 'er done, as we say in Alberta..The best part, is that he'd scare Eastern Canadians. Scare the hell out of them. That, says Burt, would make him sleep good!.But could we trust a man like that, I asked Burt — a cat who grew up on the mean streets of Red Deer, before we rescued him, and gave him a forever home — we're talking about a guy doing time, for doing bad things..Burt licked his right paw, as he often does, and said: "Do you trust the idiot you have in office now?".I had no answer to that. For once, he had me..Watch the movie, it's good. Make your own call.
